Like a lot of families, we go around the table and tell each other what we're thankful for. This year, I was sorely tempted to say:
I'm thankful for a family that never misses an opportunity to tell me that I'm a piece of shit, worthless human being. I'm thankful for a family that can find a way to blame me for everything and that can never accept responsibility for anything. I'm thankful for a family that expects me to do everything for everyone but who can rarely lift a finger or offer a kind word for me. I'm thankful for a family that is so preoccupied in their own importance that they can't be bothered to see the pain that I'm feeling or to even notice me sitting in my car crying. Again.
But I didn't. I just said that I'm thankful for all of the wonderful people in my life. And I nearly choked on my turkey. Thankfully there was much wine.
Well fuck... didn't expect this. Here's hoping you get the pleasure of being away from the people that aren't truly thankful for you~
ReplyDeleteThat sucks, hon. Holidays are always tough, but know that you have a lot of friends thinking about you tonight.
ReplyDeleteSorry to hear what your holiday was like ; that really stinks. I spent mine at a dining at a all-you-can-eat buffet restaurant eating with strangers. Not my choice of how I'd like to spend Thanksgiving either ; however most of my family is all long-since deceased and my friends are far away. Others in my church were out of town as well. People change over time ; give them that time. And if they can't accept you and love for who you are- then find new friends who will. Don't blame yourself ; have a good cry and move on. It will get better ; trust me.
ReplyDeleteFtygrl,
:)
My condolences, Mindy. But, there's no need to choke on your turkey as you say the kind, proper words at such a time and place; Simply knowing in yourself that those gathered 'round that table aren't the ones you're referring to.
ReplyDeleteLet's hoist our glasses together, thankful for the bounty of wine, and say; Here's to knowing ourselves! Whether anyone else recognizes or appreciates who we are and what we do, let us never forget that we hold a unique position between "black OR white" and "red OR blue"; Seeing the grey and the purple for the truths they hold, rather than possessing closed minds and passing judgement like the ones whose "traditions" have left little, if any, room in their hearts for love and grace."
Truly, Mindy; My hope is that you find the Greatest Peace, Know the Deepest Love and share the most Passionate Kisses with those who do in kind with you!!!
Elle
Dear Mindy:
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry for your situation. I can feel for your pain to a smaller degree. I have hung back beginning a long time ago. It does feel refreshing to a degree to meet new people and new situations.
I hope that it only gets better for you no matter what path you choose.
Stay safe
Lee
*HUGS*
ReplyDeleteThis sucks... I live far away from my relatives which may be the reason why we are on good terms generally. Sometimes it is impossible to move away from your troubles, but may be you can find a job in another country and keep your relatives at a distance?
ReplyDeleteI mean, we reaaaallly like your captions and want you to be happy and continue posting them for ever and ever!
ReplyDeleteYou are appreciated by many here, if you ever want to chat feel free to shoot me an email!
ReplyDelete